... and then we sever

Monday, 02/02/15 22h20

"Ae fond kiss, and then we sever;
Ae fareweel, alas, for ever!
Deep in heart-wrung tears I'll pledge thee,
Warring sighs and groans I'll wage thee.
Who shall say that Fortune grieves him,
While the star of hope she leaves him?
Me, nae cheerful twinkle lights me;
Dark despair around benights me."

... Just a wee extract from a from an old favourite. ... Oh for heaven's sake! That is not why I started writing this post ... "Sever" WAS the focus of the post, for sure.

It's so silly. My sister just-just (just before the "Oh for heaven's sake!" ) shared a photo of a man sobbing while holding his dying dog in his arms. The dog had succumbed to smoke inhalation during a fire rescue. It is such an emotive photo and my dam just burst.

Our dog Kira was killed in a hit-n-run accident last Tuesday and I am sad. I am sad because it had our entire household in tears. I am sad because it feels as though we lost a family member. We did, though. I am most sad because she belonged to my Nephew who had gotten her (about 13 months ago) at a time in his life when he most needed her. He and my Dad were extremely close and he had been in a depressive, and surely destructive state, since my Dad's passing. Kira started his healing process and they've been .. they were inseparable. It breaks my heart to hear him crying himself to sleep at night, again.

Following that, I may have lost a truly beautiful friendship (likely for all the right reasons), and this, I'm sure I can handle, but the 'Why???' of it all ...

Then this morning I learnt about my friend's loss and when I saw her cry (I was with her when she got the call) ... I just about lost it. If I hadn't been at work I, likely, would have. I cannot handle seeing people I love sad, and worse ... crying. It remains one of my development areas.

And tonight? When I saw this 'unrelated' picture (I, now, feel that the universe was conspiring) ... The man's pain was SO RAW ... It was too much ... Just too-too much. I need to let this out and right now seems to be that time.

I'm alright, though, just a little too much emotional weight in the space of one week. And I really should know better than trying to be too strong.



Edit Tuesday, 03/02/15 09h40:
Feeling SO MUCH better this morning. I guess I just need needed to use my words. .. And to say it all out loud.    




.Tri